It’s no secret that dating has gotten significantly harder, and people, specifically women, are starting to get fed up. Two years ago it was a hot girl summer. Then it was your healing era, followed by your villain era, and then your gaslight-gatekeep-girlboss era. But for 2023, it’s all about the single girl.
Whether you became single two months ago or ten years ago, it isn’t easy to love being alone. We live in a society that prioritizes dating above all else, especially when you’re a woman. How many of us have heard about that ever present biological clock, just ticking away menacingly while we wait for the right person? If you’re one of the nearly 50% of Americans looking to combat the pressure of finding The One, it might be time to turn to the solo date.
The solo date, for those uninitiated, is the art of taking yourself out on a date, alone. It sounds terrifying, doesn’t it? Scared or not, the trend of dating yourself has stormed the internet, and for good reason. Katie Bingham-Smith of Scary Mommy writes, “It can be a little intimidating to sit at a restaurant alone. But once I started doing my solo dates more regularly, it became easier.”
If you're looking for a way to experiment with solo dating, we have plenty of ideas for you. For beginners, think about thrift shopping alone, going to a museum, or going on a walk; And if you're feeling brave, leave the headphones at home! You can also find gallery openings on EventBrite (which usually includes free drinks!) or go out and take self portraits for your Instagram feed.
There is something especially adventurous in the mundane when you chose to go at it alone. Picture the young woman walking through Central Park, perhaps with a book in hand, completely at ease in her solitude. Giving yourself the opportunity to connect with your surroundings is an unrivaled experience.
If you're feeling fancy, try booking a four-star hotel room in your area. Ordering yourself room service without the prying eyes of a partner, sitting around in the hotel's complimentary robe and slippers, with no pressure to make interesting conversation. To treat yourself with the care you would expect from a partner is an exploration in decadence you'd be hard-pressed to find elsewhere. Honestly, any kind of date you would do with someone else, you can do alone, and probably have more fun.
Embracing your single side may not feel revolutionary at first, in fact, it may feel scary and awkward. Like you’re trying to prove something to someone who isn’t paying attention. But, however awkward it may feel, there is something to be said for falling in love with yourself. Spend some time in conversation with yourself, and you might forego the need for a relationship at all.